Why Mindfulness May Not Be For Everyone....

mind·ful·ness

ˈmīn(d)f(ə)lnəs/

noun

1. 1.

   the quality or state of being conscious or aware of something.

   
   

   "their mindfulness of the wider cinematic tradition"
2. 2.

   a mental state achieved by focusing one's awareness on the present moment, while calmly acknowledging and accepting one's feelings, thoughts, and bodily sensations, used as a therapeutic technique.

I'm an introvert. The inside of my mind is my happy place. All the things happening in the world around me...the physical status of my own body...the room I'm sitting in...not my happy place.

And according to a lot of Wellness Gurus and Lifestyle Bloggers, this is not a good thing.

But maybe, just maybe, the modern take on mindfulness and "being present" isn't for everyone. Hear me out:

Meditation and mindfulness have a dark side. According to Dr. Miguel Farias and Dr. Catherine Wikholm (authors of The Buddha Pill), this isn't necessarily a bad thing. It's just problematic when your yoga instructor, meditation leader or resident Buddha fails to mention it. The conclusion: meditation might be beneficial to some individuals, but not all -- and it might actually exacerbate mental health problems in others.

Mindfulness, in particular, is portrayed as a universal ability to be ‘in the here and now’ — how can you not want that for yourself? Well, the bad news is that it doesn’t work for everyone.

The reality is that most "wellness" instructors are not regulated, and have very little mental health training. So they're ill-equipped to deal when students find repressed emotional problems rising to the surface or becoming amplified. Since meditation and mindfulness focus so much on going inward and finding yourself, this can be especially problematic for those who have repressed serious mental trauma.

Hot take: Only mental health professionals should be prescribing a specific type of meditation or mindfulness technique.

Or hey, there's nothing wrong with having a disclaimer about "side effects" the next time you host a wellness seminar...just don't brush off or dismiss the very real (and possibly negative) experiences a person might have.

As an INTP, I spend 99% of my time in my head - thinking about or daydreaming one thing or another. Sometimes I really feel like a floating head - and I have to remember to reattach to my body and pay attention to it, even if I don't really want to. As it turns out, my physical health does impact the quality of my thoughts and my level of focus.

We often hold a lot of tension in our bodies without even realizing it. As you read this, how hunched up are your shoulders? How slumped over are you? When was the last time you closed your eyes, took a deep breath or stretched?

As you read that, you probably took a moment to notice these things. Congratulations! This is the most basic form of mindfulness. Now do something about it - stand up and stretch, look away from the computer or close your eyes for a count of 30, and relax those shoulders. Feel better?

I do. 

But I don't expect mindfulness to cure all my problems in life. I don't expect it to necessarily make me a happier, calmer person either. Because it's only one piece of a very personal puzzle and frankly, forcing someone to become "aware" of something they perhaps aren't ready to is quite the opposite of healing.

I do meditate - it's part of my spiritual practice. But I'm also very aware of all the dark stuff that lives inside me -  trauma, mental illness, that nasty little voice that tells me I'll never amount to anything, vindictive thoughts about those I envy, the violent ideas I have regarding certain members of a political faction in power...you know, normal things.

These are things you can and will encounter during a meditation session. And if you're using mindfulness as a tool to connect with and become present with your thoughts and feelings, you ought to be prepared for what might rise to the surface. Have a plan to deal with those less-than-pleasant air bubbles. 

Personally, I use mindfulness as a tool to feel more present in my body and in my practice. Bringing my focus from inside my head out to a tangible object in the real world is important for developing my Se function (which is super weak, compared to my Ti and Ne) - us Intuitive types aren't really good at seeing the forest for the trees, so to speak.

Mindfulness Ideas for the Intuitive Introvert:

1. Hold an object in your hand - a hot cup of coffee, an old book, etc. Look at it and take in the color of the object. Feel it and describe the texture and temperature of it. Give it a sniff and ask yourself what it smells like. Don't worry about any memory associations you have with the object, focus on the actual object itself.

2. Perform some kind of physical activity - whether it be yoga or dance or a sport of some kind. When your mind tunes in with your body's movements, you're automatically pulled into the present moment. If you find your thoughts starting to drift, bring yourself into the present moment by focusing on the next movement.

3. Follow a deep breathing exercise. Inhale for a count of four, hold for four, and then slowly exhale for a count of eight. Do this for several breaths, set a timer if you need to.

4. Practice active listening.

For those of us with a more witchy inclination:

• Ground and Center

• Practice candle or water scrying.

• Do a simple tarot reading for yourself. Bonus points if your question is about mindfulness!

• Create a crystal grid or spend some time "feeling" the energy of your crystals.

• Burn some incense and follow the smoke as it moves around the room.

I'd love to hear your thoughts on this - is mindfulness something that you utilize and if so, how does it work for you? And if you're just not on board, what does help you deal with all the stress of life?