I have Resting Sad Face?! - 7/24/17
I came across this article earlier this morning and after a quick read-through where I found myself nodding along, I thought I'd share some of my thoughts on it - section by section. If you're an INFJ or are often told to smile or that you "look down" I suggest giving it a read!
1.) The Extroverted Introvert:
Often in introvert spaces, I feel like kind of an oddball, because I can be a very chatty and sociable person in the right circumstances - often when talking about something I know well (like work procedures) or something I'm passionate about (like closed-class pronouns and how silly they are) - but most of the introverts I encounter seem to be taken aback by my ability to chat others up. They seem to cringe, hiss, and withdraw from the mere thought of having a mundane conversation about the summer heat with a coworker. I have no such compulsion - I can do these things easily because the script is in place, it takes no work on my end. Sure, it's ALL tiring, but it's not terribly hard either. And it adds up.
So yes, I can be very polite, sociable, and friendly in certain situations, but like the author of this article states, it is not my default. I am an inward, pensive person. I do tend to get lost in my own head often. When I'm deeply thinking (or worrying) about something, my face tends to close down and I suppose....to some people this can look like sadness or distress.
2.) Feeling like a Fake
Like the author, I am also an HSP and struggle with my mental health. Putting on a facade of happiness and cheerfulness is exhausting, especially on bad anxiety or depression days. And feeling compelled to keep that facade in place just for other people's comfort is agony.
I'm also afraid of confrontation and will do almost anything in my power to avoid it. I've always been a people-pleaser and when I'm unable to do so I feel awful. I end up feeling like my social side is fake and callous, even though it's really not. But my withdrawn, moody introvert side is just as real and deserves it's place in my life. I shouldn't feel the need to hide it for other people.
3.) The Chameleon
I also tend to match my energy level and enthusiasm to those around me, as much as I can. Luckily, I do have some people who understand that I tend to be more withdrawn and quiet and aren't bothered so much by that. But in work situations or social outings, I definitely find myself conforming to the level of energy around me.
SUMMARY: We INFJ's often tend to look a bit down or neutral while in deep thought or contemplation. There's nothing wrong with us, we're not sad, we're just in our heads. Bugger off. :)
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